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G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
Movie Review
August 16, 2009
Directed by Stephen
Sommers
Starring Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans, Rachel Nichols, Ray Park,
Sienne Miller, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Christopher Eccleston, Lee
Byung-hun, and Dennis Quaid.
Backstory
Everything old truly is new again, as all my childhood toys become
fodder for Hollywood. When Transformers was such a huge hit
two years ago, we all knew it was just a matter of time before GI Joe
came to the big screen. But in what iteration? GI
Joe has been around since the 1960s. Would it be the
original? The classic GI Joe vs Cobra from my youth, or some
new iteration? All I knew was, the early photos of Snake Eyes
has his costume looking right, so I was getting pumped.
Plot
In the not-too-distant future, weapons manufacturer James McCullen has
perfected a new form of nanotechnology called nanomites.
These microscopic robots have fantastic weapons potential, as
they can eat metal. The first prototype nanomite warheads are
being transported by an American military unit, whose two top officers
go by the nicknames Duke and Ripcord. While in the convoy,
Duke and Ripcord are ambushed by some form of miliary unit with
advanced weaponry, the type of which they've never seen, and they're
bailed out by a unit with equally advanced weaponry. Turns
out they were rescued by GI Joe, a highy trained, daring special
missions force. Duke and Ripcord quickly joing GI Joe to
find out who stole the warheads, why they want them, and James McCullen
might be involved. Also working for James McCullen is the
femme fatale Ana, who was once Duke's finace, and is now known as the
Baroness. What caused her to switch sides?
What I Liked
Was it alright to cheer in the theatre the first time I heard someone
say, "And knowing is half the battle?" This truly draws more
from the cartoon of the 1980s than the comic books of the 1980s as
character development and plot take a back seat to wall-to-wall action.
This is just one long fight scene. And Snake Eyes
was done right, so I was happy.
What I
Didn't Like
Formulaic plot, too much shaky-cam in the fights, generic music score,
and I still don't understand why the Joes need power armor.
Final
Assessment
Waves of nostalgia helped me overlook most of the flaws. A
good time, a solid action adventure, and not much else.
3 Nibs
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