L & I
Day 1: Arrival

We all reach points in our lives where we just want to get away for a while. That's why we invented vacations. I had reached such a point. So, after some e-mail negotiations with L, I decided to head on down to Camrose and spend some time with her, and her three attractive roommates. At first, I was a little nervous about this trip. L and I have never really hung out together without Chuck (her boyfriend) around. I was fearful it would end up like that Seinfeld episode. When Jerry cancels on an evening out, George and Elaine decide to go it alone, and discover that they have absolutely nothing in common. As always, to mask my nervousness, I started making jokes. I started teasing Chuck about how I was doing this to steal his girlfriend and all that. But then, something really weird happened. Throughout the jokes, I was soon able to convince myself that I might actually be capable of stealing her away from Chuck. As I departed for Camrose, I was fearful of one of two extremes happening:

1) L and I wind up on her couch in a hot, sweaty entangled mass of naked bodies, only to be filled with regret the next morning upon what we did.
2) L and I wind up on her couch, staring out into space, saying no more than two or three words to each other at a time.

Either way, I'd be in for an interesting time. And, once again, I was to see that my imagination was always much more entertaining than reality.

With road trip tape in the cassette deck, I drove off to Camrose. It was a drive I had done many times before, and I'm almost at the point where I can do it in my sleep. I think I must have done it in my sleep, simply because it was so uneventful. Soon, I saw Camrose on the horizon. I'm continually amazed at how the city is being built up. I couldn't help but stop in and check out the new Wal-Mart. You see one Wal-Mart, you've seen them all. Although, this one did have the brand new Ash action figure from Pokémon, so I couldn't help but snatch that up. From here, it was across the road to the good old Duggan Mall. I always wonder what I would've been like had I grown up in a city. I think I would have made an excellent mallrat. No matter the size of the mall, I can just wander around in one for hours. But, I had to quit my wandering. It was time to head on up to the campus.

I spent a few hours just wandering the halls of Augustana, taking some pictures of the old place for eventual posting on the website. It's weird the memories that started coming back to me. So many old thoughts and feelings came flooding back. So many, that it's a story for another day.

I even headed uptown, just like old times. I don't know why, but I just heard this urge to go shopping at the Bargain Store. And it's still filled with crap. At least in my day, it used to have decent stuff, like Star Wars action figures and great tasting no-name chocolate chip cookies. But now, the toy section is a shadow of it's former self, and the cookies are no more. I continued my journey uptown. I had been reading in the paper about the restoration work underway at the Baily theater, so I was curious to see what was going on. It was closed to the public, of course, but I pressed my nose up close to the window to peer in. It looked like a construction site; a definite work in progress. I glanced at my watch and decided to head back to campus. On the walk back, I happened to run into Mander, an old friend, and I had soon promised to come in and see her and Darmok sometime on my trip.

As I returned to campus, I glanced at my watch. I still had an hour or so before I had to meet up with L. I thought I would head on up to the Students' Union office. I had gotten a notice in the mail a few weeks ago telling me that I had some books in the used bookstore that no one was buying and I should go pick them up. So, I went on up to the office, and told the office manager that I had made a special trip today just to get these books. After my consignment number was pulled up on the computer, we went over to the used bookstore, and got my books. I then followed her back to the Students' Union office.

Me>> I'd like to donate some books to the used bookstore.
Office Manager>> OK. What do you want to donate?
[I hold forth the books she just returned to me.]
Office Manager>> You've got to be kidding me.
Me>> Nope. I don't want them anymore, so I may as well try to get a few buck for them. Office Manager>> But they aren't selling because they aren't used anymore. Most people never bother coming back to get their books. I usually donate them in their names to the library.
Me>> Why didn't you put a little note in with the notice saying that? I wouldn't have bothered coming back either, then.
Office Manager>> Well, as I said, most people usually don't bother coming back.
Me>> Well, I don't want these back.
Office Manager>> Would you like me to donate them to the library?
Me>> Yes, please.

With that business out of the way, I returned to the lounge in the Faith and Life Center to await L. I had about half an hour to go before meeting her. I parked myself by the window, with a good view of the bench under the tree where I would be meeting her. I love the bench under the tree in front of North Hall. It's just so cinematic, and because of that, I decided I had to make a cinematic entrance. I was leafing through a copy of the school paper to pass the time, occasionally glancing at my watch to see if it was time to meet L or not. It wasn't long before it was time and yup, there she was. Wait a few minutes to build suspense, and time to make an entrance! I stepped out the door and walked up to L, very slowly, and very dramatically. We hugged in that way that old friends greet each other, and then headed off to supper.

Over Whoppers at Camrose's new Burger King, we swapped tales of our lives to date. She spoke of her recent trip out east to see Chuck, I spoke of my mother's burgeoning political career, and we spoke of things past, like my old nemesis Brad Goertz.

Me>> I've got to learn to let go of the past.
L>> Yeah. You and Chuck....
Me [aside]>> Hmm. I wonder what that's about. None of my business, though. It's not like I'll include it in an upcoming column or anything.

From here, it was over to Video Update. One thing we had planned for the weekend was we were going to watch movies. And, I'm not sure why, but L had an itch to try out a Sega Dreamcast. After a few minutes of scouring the video store, we had agreed upon The Goonies, 8MM, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, The Prince of Egypt, and Batman: Mask of the Phantasm. We also got a Dreamcast and the game Power Stone. With this settled upon, we headed back to her house, and time to meet the attractive roommates!

Let me introduce you to the roommates. As always, names changed to protect the innocent. Lady Jaye was the athletic one, and always wearing a toque upon her head. Harley Quinn was the somewhat outrageous one (there's one in every group, isn't there?). And the third one I had very little to do with in my trip, so she will be simply referred to as the Ghost. The topic of conversation at the moment was the new mathematical modeling course that Lady Jaye had signed up for. When it was revealed that one of my degrees was in math, her eyes lit up as though she had found a kindred spirit. Little did she know....

Lady Jaye>> So, what do you think of this course? Do you think it sounds interesting?
Me>> Look. I don't care about math anymore. There was a time when I loved it; when I found a poetry to a perfectly solved calculus equation, but I've just done it so much that I'm sick of it. I'm sure this course is fascinating, but I really don't want to talk about math.

I hate to use the cliche, but you could have knocked her over with a feather. These three were the quintessential college students. They were still thrilled with the pursuit of knowledge and each day held a new discovery. They had yet to grow sick of the confining walls of a classroom and get burned by how useless their degrees would really be. I was like that once...a long time ago. It feels like it was in my childhood. Ah, those three are as innocent as babes children [can't be sexist].

Soon, the others left and it was just L, Lady Jaye, and myself. We decided it was time to do some shopping! A guest in the house convinced them of how lacking in snack foods they were. Off to the Co-op! Purchases of pop were made! Philosophical decisions about what kind of ice cream to get, eventually solved by the flip of a coin. It's one of those things that has to be experienced. It was back to the house, and Lady Jaye soon went on her way.

It was here that L and I made the discovery that the Dreamcast couldn't be hooked up to her antiquated TV and VCR. That, and it only had one controller. After we took it back, we decided to start watching the movies. We ran though The Goonies, 8MM, and Rocky Horror. The Rocky Horror Picture Show ended at around 3 am, so it was here that we decided to go to bed, and prepare for the challenges of a new day. I got the lumpy sofa, and L went up to her room. Day one done, and none of my fears were proven.